It’s been so relentless, I am not sure exactly that I can recall when the season started or where it will end.
But trials, waters, or hard seasons are no excuse for the way I have been acting, or for the way I have acted in the past, as a general pattern that is becoming far too normal for me. I feel as though I must make a public apology, to whoever will see it, regarding my conduct.
I have recently been a rock in a hard place. I have been feeling like my relationship with God isn’t all that I want it to be. I want to love Him passionately, above everything else. I want to believe His promises, not only that, I want to believe that they are enough for me–that even without anything else, God’s promises are enough. God is enough. Even if I was destitute–simply knowing Him would make me still full of joy and life.
We hear often that God is our Father. Jesus himself teaches us to regard him that way (Matt 6:9). This is a good and assuring truth. It is especially comforting when we see the shortcomings of the fathers on this earth, that we each have a perfectly seeing and perfectly loving Father who cares for us. There is truly nothing like it.
I would like to take this time today to tell you a story. It is not one for the faint of heart, or one for those who wish to live the unexamined, unchallenged, or uninspired life.
I wish to tell you the tale of a young girl, social media and the wandering heart–starring my very own, genuine, wandering heart as the main character of this tumultuous story. Tread carefully, friend, and be on guard for any walls, combativeness or defensiveness rising within your own heart.